Bored At Inc.
December 18, 2009 by Jozi Insider
The who’s who and who’s that of Joziville flocked to Inc
for the MTN party on Friday to watch Bongani-less Jozi (they have a new cheap weaved premadona working with them now) , Skwatter camp (all 90 of them), failed-to-resurrect TKZee and few pounds lighter HHP.
The pre-recorded performances kept D-listers entertained while I was swinging from the VVIP Champagne room to the MTN VIP room tracking rumoured free alcohol – WTF?
Kuli, smashed as only she can be, managed to hijack the event and declared it her birthday party. I love her, LOL! So the alcohol-free VVIP turned into Kuli’s room where she was leaping from arm to arm and wet-kissing all in sundry. No one, I repeat, no one in Joburg drinks like this girl. Much respect to her liver (on that topic, a quick RIP to Manto)!!
I also spotted threesome minus the creepy looking one. They looked like they were consoling stick-thin Tatum Keshwar on her recent loss at Miss World (and then being deMiss South Africa’d a day later). Her presence was sour and her smile reminded me of Melman (the giraffe) on Madagascar when he was constipated. STAY home if you know you’ll only have an exhausting aura.
Khanyi Mbau was also there, accompanied by a huge chunk of a man (bodyguard?) but she left as quickly as she arrived. Kelly did not make it to the event honey – you could’ve stayed longer. We miss you… okay that was a lie!
My favourite psycho model, Mirriam Ngomani, was also there – looking hot, bothered and sober. Saw her running around, perhaps missioning for the rumoured free drinks a la moi. I should’ve told her about the handsome Marketing Manager of MTN, Andrew or something, and the crazy-eyed Bridget (MTN PR manager) who were more than friendly with something cold.
The David Tlale Green Collection model (that’s for beefy girls) and certified groupie; Myrna Burgess was also there in a huge tiered white tent. I split my sides laughing at the sight of her dress.
Speaking of David Tlale, I spotted the brand’s Creative Assistant, Andy, who looked bleak and bored, despite all the attention from models who were obviously trying to score a free garment.
WHY were people bored? Tired smiles and drooping eyes… what’s going on Joziville? I am just grateful that this was possibly the last big event for the year – could we work on looking good in January – just before the Fashion Weeks start?
The event was well attended nonetheless; from Struggling models to recession victims but I seem to be the only one still hung-up on the alcohol issue? Dang!
Just a quick word prior to my entering the event: Why did the door lady think she was the only pebble on the beach? Why did she even have to check my name on the guestlist? Did she not see me greeting and engaging the crowd pullers? Being snapped by paparazzi-like snappers?
I did not appreciate being sidelined while unknown wannabes pushed past me with an air of importance! Know who you need to know you half-baked class-less tart! Phew, enough venting for now…
By Jozi Insider ©
Pics: Gesh Conco & Myrna B Facebook 
Bra Bizza on Fri, 18th Dec 2009 10:38 pm
the so called “who’s who” is nothin but bullshit idea….people who really matter dont wanna be seen with failed-wanna-be-models or tired tv personalities who’d earn shit loads of money at strip clubs.
lola on Fri, 18th Dec 2009 10:55 pm
Did you mean to say at the “sight” not at the “site”?
Busi on Sat, 19th Dec 2009 6:04 am
Is this Mirriam gal even attractive?? just saying…
rego on Sat, 19th Dec 2009 6:57 am
lmfbao!!! Should Jozi insider not be a supplement in all national sunday papers? This has 2 be da article of the year!
Jozi Insider on Sat, 19th Dec 2009 8:54 am
Thank you Rego, u’re much too kind. We certainly hope that Jozi Insider will be a must-read and that people will keep logging on to Just Curious.
Apologies for the stupid errors, as pointed out above.
Brown Shuga on Sat, 19th Dec 2009 9:55 am
I agree with you Rego,….Jozi Insider is a classic, it don’t get better than this!!! “failed-to-ressurect TKZee” Am so glad someone else agrees with me, their return has been disappointing. for me, at least. not worth all the hype.
Uyahlanya kodwa JI coz Tatum looks cute to me in that picture nje…were you already tipsy from the free alcohol? heheh.
Awesome piece!
Bra Bizza on Sat, 19th Dec 2009 9:58 am
no Miriam is not attractive at all nor is she hot….i’ve seen 1000 chicks eKasi who would give her run for her money. Overrated like this Mbau chick…people cant differentiate between someone who is well groomed(need money for that) and someone who’s naturally hot…come to Dube and you’ll see what im talkin about.
Sammy Phatlane on Sat, 19th Dec 2009 10:00 am
So one would say in the case of the MTN event, t’was a hectic flop, with everyone just putting up with the event, and a dash of glamour to go with the failed attempt??? And what happened to the free booze?
Manyonyoba on Sat, 19th Dec 2009 1:55 pm
Its nt only the Jozi gelz wh r the drunken masters tjo come2 Cptn U will c tjo (Bayakhuphela)
Ramon Thomas on Sat, 19th Dec 2009 3:11 pm
Were you guys bored writing this blog. You have nothing good to say, especially about Tatum Keshwar. Well I have the inside scoop on her sad face if you really wanna know contact me.
Ke Gay on Sat, 19th Dec 2009 4:38 pm
This event was on tuesday wasn’t?
LoveYouToo on Sun, 20th Dec 2009 10:43 pm
this “primadonna’ working with Jozi? is she their new member?
Kiki on Sun, 20th Dec 2009 11:53 pm
…ma boys were teased here so there is no way am commentin any further..LOL
Cnglemother on Mon, 21st Dec 2009 11:33 am
i feel you kiki!
yes it was the tuesday (15th). Not even a mention of of the new unknown acts that perfomed? uwrongo Jozi insider.
Cnglemother on Mon, 21st Dec 2009 3:29 pm
Wssup with D-Bongs stealing studio equipment kwa Lance (kulandlu iseKew) to open up his own? apparently unyamalele – dont quote me its our yeoville gossip with no tangible proof.
Vesa on Mon, 21st Dec 2009 5:20 pm
@ Cngle….wena le Yeoville mgozi kwa kwa kwa!
mischiefstylings on Tue, 22nd Dec 2009 1:42 pm
JI did the so called “new cheap weaved premadona” sing good?
Or were u 2 busy tryna score free booze?
It would b nice if you actually commented on her performance rather than her look.. all we know is that you could be a FUGLY too.. no one is judging..
i think you would have done a great job if you told us how you thought she performed and sang..
Build the talent not break them down cos they cant afford an expensive weave like Khanyi Mbau etc.. you have no idea
mischiefstylings on Tue, 22nd Dec 2009 1:48 pm
…You have no idea how much tht would actually help them rather than commenting on their blimming weaves..
buddy we see cheap weaves all the time! Even Khanyi’s expensive weave is cheap to others..how bout you use your articles to improve peoples lives.. you are a very talented writer and you sound very smart..so BE SMART!
Jozi Insider on Tue, 22nd Dec 2009 3:27 pm
Mischiefstylings:
Jozi Insider considers and values all commentary on this page and yours so happens to land on here and will thus be considered. Kindly note that the Insider is not a music critic, hence I commented on the aesthetic–which was unpleasant in this case. The Insider does compliment and give credit where it’s due.
You seem to have taken a personal turn with this write up, which would suggest that u either know Miss El Cheapo in one way or another or you’re sporting the same hair do. Unfortunately this industry is not the faint-hearted. If Ms El Cheapo can’t take the stings that come with it, then she better develop a thick skin fast. If she needs help, I know of a good “executionist.”
Thanks for your comment and I hope u come back to read more from the Insider.
By the way sista gurl, Jozi Insider is REMOTELY FAR & MILES REMOVED from the word FUGLY. My skin is layers thick and impenetrable and so your diss simply bounces back and goes right back to the sender.
Mischiefstylings on Tue, 22nd Dec 2009 4:02 pm
nah buddy, i deal with music..
thts my main area of expertise, obviously yours is appearance!
[nah, nothing personal..seems you also took it quite personal when you were overlooked and being sidelined for unknown wannabes! so much so that u had to call that door dame who was simply doing her job "half-baked class-less tart!"]
i just dont like it when youth is shut down for appearance rather than what they do!
mischiefstylings is not a sistu girl..he is a man
Jozi Insider on Tue, 22nd Dec 2009 7:38 pm
Well, Mr. Mischiefstylings (can I call u Ms. Thang? Don’t ask why, just feel like it), u’re quite right in your presumption; can u imagine standing in the doorway waiting for someone to confirm ur name when u know that u indeed RSVPed and u were confirmed? Yes, I took it personal.
Brown Shuga on Tue, 22nd Dec 2009 11:19 pm
LOL!!
Sasha Fierce on Mon, 11th Jan 2010 1:21 pm
MS Mischiefstylings o fra tota!!!
P.S on Fri, 22nd Jan 2010 2:42 pm
LOL….Hahahahahahah we will miss u JI….:-)