The Ndumiso Lindi Interview!

Watch him get big…

I first saw/heard Ndumiso Lindi at a Blacks Only comedy show in 2008. I was writing the City Pulse column at the time and after that show I couldn’t wait to go home and write about how incredibly funny I thought he was. It was love at first joke. (ok, that’s wack lol).

I found him months later on Facebook, in 2009 and told him I was a fan. He replied and said he actually read my article and had it up on his wall. In return for the funny jokes he cracked at the show, I had also made him happy with the column. Happiness all round!

Standing on that Emperors Palace stage in his hat, there was something about him maan. Something about the confidence in his “deep” voice (which I absolutely think should be on radio) and I knew it. I knew that THIS guy, is going to be huge.

I said that before I could find out anything about Ndumiso but after doing this interview with him I can proudly and confidently confirm ukuba , yes indeed, he is destined for great things!

This is quite a long interview but it’s worth it so if you are Just Curious nje ngam, go grab a cup of coffee, settle down and enjoy!

This is  Ndumiso Lindi like you have never “read” him before

Brown Shuga: I define Ndumiso Lindi as a young and very talented up and coming comedian. How do you define yourself?

Ndumiso Lindi: An ambitious individual, who’s all about having fun in life, easy going and loves laughter.

BS: Tell us a bit about your background, where you grew up and how you ended up as a comedian?

Ndumiso: I’m from Zwelitsha, a township next to King William’s Town in the  Eastern Cape. Last born out of four kids. My dad is a well-known master of ceremony (MC) around Eastern Cape, whether its weddings, 21^st birthdays, Lobola negotiations, uMgidi…name it he’s there. So he used to collect those Joke pocketbooks e.g. 1000 jokes in 1, and share them with us. Those were his icebreakers for these events.

BS: LOL smart  man and everyone thought he came up with them himself…tjo! Carry on..

Ndumiso: LOL. So in the year 2000 I went to study Retail Management in Cape Technikon…

BS: kwa kwa kwa kwa @ you in retail…

Ndumiso: Eish, the next year I changed to Graphic Design. In 2003 The Vodacom Campus Comedy tour come through for a lunch hour show. It had three Comics, before they introduced the last guy they announced that they’re giving away a CellPhone and they’re looking for 3 students who can be funny for 2minutes.

My best buddy Molete Mathaba was like “dude go you’re funny”…I was like “heeeellll noooo”. So he went for it and he was funny cause he used to go to Cape Comedy Collective workshops. I’m sitting there thinking I can do that, second guy jumps up and he gets booed off. After that I didn’t think about it I just got on stage and made stuff up…they were enjoying it but I ran out of time so my friend won the phone that day and I vowed that next year when they come back I will be prepared.

Came 2004 and I won the phone, I thought that’s it I’m done, and I got what I wanted. The tour host Comedian Cokey Falkow invited me to do open mic spots at the armchair theatre…and as they say the rest is Geography.

BS: Wait, all u won was a phone?

Ndumiso: It was all about the phone…a Nokia 3310 nogal LOL!!

BS: hahahah we used to call it “student card”LOl at least you won something! So growing up, what did you want to be?

Ndumiso: Believe it or not I thought I was going to be a Veterinarian cause I loved animals…I still do, I’m a National Geographic Couch Potato. Then I went to school…lets just say reality kicked in- LOL.

BS: I know what you mean. Now, you’ve recently just moved to Joburg from Cape Town, yini is there no money in Cape Town? What inspired the move?

Ndumiso: Cape Town ja nhe…look Cape Comics groomed me to be the comic that I am today and I will always be appreciative of that. What inspired the move… I remember the first time I performed at the Blacks Only show at Emperor’s Palace, it was my first time to see black comedians express themselves in their home language and telling our stories. I had gotten so comfortable performing for a white and Coloured audience to a point I forgot my own voice. So I couldn’t wait to come perform in Jo’burg and the audience responded so well to my material.

I realized I got more bookings in JHB and sometimes I missed some opportunities because I was based in Cape Town. Then it hit me that I spend more time performing outside CT…move Darkie!! But I have to say starting out in CT with a very difficult audience has made me so confident as a Performer, which is why you can put me anywhere and I will crack Peeps up no matter what the colour is.

BS: Wow, I love that! Now you’ve touched on it a bit but if you were to expand, how exactly has your move to JHB affected your career?

Ndumiso: Ow man the move was the best decision I took last year, my career is so happy its blowing a Vuvuzela LOL!!

BS: Hahahah

Ndumiso: I’m in a new place, new people and I’m exposed to new things…that’s great inspiration when it comes to my material. And through speaking to some business minded individuals, you start learning how to treat yourself as a business.

What I like about JHB is it really pushes you to step out of your comfort zone and Grind hard cause talent is not enough. I don’t want to be good at what I do, everybody is good at that…I want to be the best.

BS: That’s me guy… I’ve said the exact same thing before., totally feel you! Okay, so obviously besides doing standup, I assume you MC events as well, right?      What else do you do?

Ndumiso: Yhe hosting or being MC comes with the package. Before I moved to JHB I worked as an Art Director at The Jupiter Drawing Room for four years, an ad agency in Cape Town. So I was balancing a 9-5 and my stand up which got a bit too hectic cause I was turning down big gigs to stay at work. The time came and I resigned. For now I’m focusing all my energy on building my brand as “Ndumiso Lindi the ROOSTA” the Stand Up Comedian. I will later freelance as a designer or art director but for now lets make the World laugh.

BS: And all of that is enough for you to make a living?

Ndumiso: So far so good. You just need to be clever with your cash, how you save and spend it….don’t forget to keep it coming.

BS: You have to answer this…let’s say I had a launch for Just Curious and I wanted to ask you to be the MC. What would you charge me?

Ndumiso: Wow I would say just a leg, forget the arm LOL…Seriously that’s what Agents and Managers are there for, to negotiate for us because we are so soft hearted.

BS: So do comedians charge based on the number of hours they’re required to be at an event or do you just charge a flat rate for the night?

Ndumiso: Comics operate differently so I can’t talk for all. But “time” does play a big role.

(Seeing that Ndumiso wasn’t forthcoming with this one, I asked David Kau the same question and he said it all depended on the comedian and their experience but disclosed that the highest paid comedian at the Blacks Only Show got R15 000 for a 10 minute performance. I don’t know about y’all but i think that’s a lotta money.)

BS: So since you guys get paid for each event you “perform” at, shouldn’t you stop repeating jokes and come up with new jokes for each event?

Ndumiso: Uyabona Lelo…

BS: Err…it’s Brown Shuga…

Ndumiso: (pause)…eerr ok, I’m gonna really try to explain this. I’ll do it in 3 ways:

1. Lets say you see me performing a 10 minute set at the Blacks Only in Emperor’s Palace, then 3 months down the line you see me gigging the same 10min for Heavy Weights Comedy Jam still at Emperor’s again nhe…what you don’t realise is those are two different markets all in all (1 Metrofm and the other Jacaranda), it just happened that you and 15% of the audience saw my blacks only show, meanwhile 85% have never seen my act before. And I would have added maybe 2 new gags in that 10min. But you hear a few old jokes and think he’s doing the same stuff.

BS: It makes sense…

Ndumiso: 2. Its easy to come up with stuff you think might work but working on that tight standing ovation 10min set takes time which is what clubs are there for…practice. You start with an idea and add to it the more you do a gag. You might see me doing a joke for the first time about Tiger Woods right? Gag lasting 2 minutes. Then you see me again doing the same joke 6 weeks down the line and this time its pimped out to a full 11 minutes only on Tiger woods. Gags are like wine, they get better with time.

BS: Tjo, and here I was thinking “gag” meant … ummm..carry on!

Ndumiso: lol 3. The confusing part is some people come back to hear that same stuff again. I get on and do a new tight 10 minutes. After the show they come to me saying “Hey why didn’t you do the Tiger Woods Joke” …another “Yhe I brought my 4 friends to hear it”. We can’t please everyone but we try.

BS: Heheh tough job you got so how do you prepare for a stand up show?

Ndumiso: Everything is in my head, I just write headlines in point form on a piece of paper to know my routine e.g Crime,Tiger Woods,Lelo…etc. Then I will run it in my head over and over…then show time.

BS: Mmh…tough job! Mara be honest chomam, you guys sometimes “steal” jokes from these American comedians we don’t know and pose them as yours… or is it called inspiration?

Ndumiso: I wont say it doesn’t happen ,I’ve seen it a few times myself…. Inspiration is different from that. You watch a Richard Pryor DVD you will be inspired by his delivery, timing etc. But taking his joke as it is, now that’s not cool…that’s stealing.

BS: Abomakapa! So which comedians, local and international have inspired you?

Ndumiso: Locally I have to say Riaad Moosa, the way he tackles a subject is amazing. He dries the subject out and his stage performance is so out of this world. David Kau because he is one of the few comics I know who keep their material updated with current issues. Like aliens might land tonight and David is already working on it before Sunrise.

Internationally I would go for Legends like Richard Pryor, young Eddie Murphy, Chris Rock, Dave Chappelle, uk comic Lee Evans…These guys mastered the art of Performance. A Local Comedian Mel Miller gave me the best advice when I was starting out: “If you get on stage and bomb out, people not loving your stuff…don’t take it to your heart. If you get on stage and kill, do well…never take it to your head.”

BS: Wow, that is so profound and I think it applies to everyone whose job is in the limelight. David Kau & Trevor Noah are two of the most successful comedians in the country, is there anything you have learnt from each one of them and what is that?

Ndumiso: From both of them combined I’ve realized you can only be your own competition and if you start seeing others as your competition you start sounding and doing things like them.

BS: At this stage in your life, with everything that you’ve experienced and all the choices you’ve made, is there anything you regret or wish you’d done differently?

Ndumiso: Ow no…without sounding like a beauty Pageant Queen…I would do everything again cause it has made me who I am today. Reminds me of @Thafilmaka’s tweet ”our life is made up of a series of experiences. Each one will make you stronger, even though sometimes it will be hard for you to realize it”

BS: Nice! Now out of all the jokes you’ve said and came up with, which one do you think was the best ever? (Yes, you have to say it)
Ndumiso: writing it and seeing me acting it out on stage is not the same Lelo… you do that with Knock knock jokes. But the jokes I do about how different we’re are as races are my favorites because they’re funny and at the same time leave you thinking. The “truth” is funny.
BS: Whooop! Now I’m all excited so Where/When do we catch your next performances?

Ndumiso: Next Month (February)  you can catch me on the 7^th , Cool Runnings Undergroud in Melville, 11-13 Parker’s comedy and Jive Monte casino …. thats the same club I performed for the Proteas and the England team * ehem * LOL…

BS: Wow!!!! That’s amazing lol

Ndumiso: …anyway..ever since I started comedy I’ve always wanted to take it home so that opportunity has finally arrived 26^th Feb, 99% Xhosa Comedy in East London * Habba habba * LOL. Then the big one 27^th February 46664 Its no Joke at Sun City…I’m getting an orgasm by just saying that aahhh!!

BS: Wow! You’re doing it big, boy!

Ndumiso: Yeah, so people can join my fan page on facebook for more updates: Search for Ndumiso Lindi the Roosta

BS: I’ve been meaning to ask you actually, where does the “Roosta” come from?

Ndumiso: When we were young my mom always preached about looking  presentable xa uyokudibana nabantu. Coz if u not someone is gonna ask ‘ngumntana kabani lo? So on stage I rock a tie and sometimes a cardigan or a pull over. Then later my hat was a cherry on top.  I love hats,not mafikizolo hats that u find in truworths…stylish unique hats.

BS: Hahahaha okay!

Ndumiso: So my friend joked 1 day and said in xhosa ‘
Hay’ Mtshana with the whole hat n tie look ingathi ungumQhagi’. Then everytime I would dress up preparin 2 go do my thang he would tease n say ‘aw Rooster!! And I liked it and I thot there’s somethin I can work with. Took the ‘er’ out and xhosarized it…The Roosta was born.

BS: That is an amazing story bhut’wam!

NDUMISO ON LIFE…..

BS: Comedians are very observant people, because most of your jokes come from observing life and what’s going on around. This means that you know a lot of things about people and their behaviour. Would I be wrong in therefore expecting comedians to understand women better and thereby conclude that you guys make better lovers?

Ndumiso: Yes you’re wrong…it shouldn’t be an expectation; you can’t expect doctors to be in good health all the time or a financial adviser to be rich. The are no better Lovers out there,

BS: There aren’t??? (oh gosh, he can’t say this…not after I’ve waited all these years)

Ndumiso: No, just a bunch of imperfect people coming together, accepting their imperfections and creating their own Perfect world. …Wow..Did I say that…LOL

BS: Wow, I think you’re perfect. (*sigh* I come back to reality) As a black young man, in South Africa, what frustrates you the most about being in a relationship, especially with a black woman?

Ndumiso: I fear for my life on this one so I’m gonna pass…

BS: Hahah schigen! Do you believe in love?

Ndumiso: BIG YESS…

BS: How do you know when you’re in love with a gal?

Ndumiso: It’s when airtime is not an issue…

BS: That  is so cute!! You’re a black man so at one point in your life, you cheated on your woman. Why did you do it?

Ndumiso: WOW MAN this feels like a Debra Patta Moment…what does Cheating have to do with colour?? Yho!! You make cheating sound as if its something Black man were blessed with. Haven’t you watched Cheaters?? It’s a universal thing that falls under Recession and Global warming…watch CNN.

(First he tells me I’m Debra Patta, next he says I must watch CNN, mncimm I think I wanna swear at Mr Perfect now)

BS: Whatever Ndumiso, you know what I’m talking about! heheh. Do you think there is ever a point where a woman is to blame for her man cheating? I’m saying this because I had a debate with my friend the other day and she thinks if your man cheats on you it’s because you do not look after him properly.

Ndumiso: All I’m gonna say is if you know your man likes his samoosa spicy hot and you keep giving him a lemon and herb…he’s gonna go get that spicy hot edge somewhere else. So go out there and buy that tabasco…

BS: Heheheheheh thanks for the education!

YOUNG, BLACK AND AFRICAN!

BS: What do you enjoy most about living in South Africa right now?

Ndumiso: The Endless opportunities the youth have in this Country. You can’t blame the past for your laziness, get up and do something.

BS: Well said! What do you think is the one thing that we as a country excel in?

Ndumiso: We are a very welcoming country. I have friends from overseas who can’t believe how nice they get treated here but back home it’s a different story. You find a lot of tourists drinking and dancing eKasi, whether its Gugulethu or Soweto, having fun.

BS: What do we fail dismally in?

What we fail on is crime. The same reason White South Africans will think twice about going to the Townships because they’re afraid to be hijacked and all that stuff.

BS: So if you had a choice to live anywhere in the continent, where would it be and why?

Ndumiso: On the real…Mzantsi baby…wouldn’t exchange it for nada. Remember when People kept going on about this Country going to the Dogs since the 1994 Elections took place…and here we’re, still standing. They leave expecting a Civil war or something to break and come back to find us talking about the World Cups and all. Asimanga ndawonye…siyaphambili sisi…

BS: So true!!! Tell me, is there something about you that you think truly represents what a true African is or is like?

Ndumiso: Hope…I’m full of hope for a better future for the next generation. I’m still young but I also feel the need to be a role model for my 13 yr old Nephew and Niece. SA has a very bad past but in a few months time we’re hosting the biggest event in the World. What’s important is I need to work hard to show that guy back home ukuba its possible mfowethu, forget the dusty streets and the lack of facilities…Dream big.

BS: Wow! I like you more with each answer! So, African man, would you support or be against making Africa one big happy family …the United States of Africa?

Ndumiso: Personally I don’t think its possible looking at all the Egos our Power hungry African leaders have. You have Leaders who have been in Power before I was even born, you try to tell me they’re prepared to step down to have one president run the whole continent…Hell No!!

The African continent is the richest continent on planet earth with oil, gas, minerals, etc.  but with all of that we’re still the poorest continent. Look at how many African Countries are at war caused by their Ethnicity and religion. But no one is stepping up, instead you have Facebook groups popping up everywhere titled Save Darfu, Stop the war in Sudan, Stop Xenophobia, EFFEN ETC!! How are we supposed to form a unity if we can’t even solve what’s going on in our own Countries.

BS: Wow, thank you so much for you time Ndumiso but before I let you go, help our JHB newbies out. You have just recently moved to Jozi so tell us “5 Things You Have Learnt About JHB & Its People”?

Ndumiso:

1. Because of the Crime issue, if your car breaks down on a high way don’t expect people to stop for you…they all think it’s a set up.
2. In JHB a 45-minute drive is a short distance e.g. “Where do you stay? Really? I live close by. I’m 45 minutes away from you.”
3. Everyone is striving to be seen behind the rope…go to the clubs…(*pointing* ”I’m with David kau”)
4. The opportunities are endless; you can create a whole career out of being a Virgin.
5. Finally the over used line in JHB…Drum roll…..”I’ll call you”…means the opposite.

BS: kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa

Ends!

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You can find Ndumiso on Facebook: Ndumiso Lindi

Or follow him on Twitter: @roosta27

& follow us on Twitter hawu @JustCuriousZA

(Now somebody put this guy on radio!!!! I approve!)