Love Off The Social Networks
On Sunday, someone on Twitter posted a message questioning why a certain guy wasn’t following his girlfriend on Twitter. My immediate reaction to this was “Why should he?” She reasoned that he also (often, if not always) ignores her tweets to him & never replies. She said this meant she doesn’t matter to him, because she, on the other hand, tells everyone who cares to listen that he’s her man.
My take on that is this: Firstly relationships that are run on Social Networks come with problems because as it is with most conversations that take place on such platforms, whatever is said there is more for “showing off” than it is about the message being relayed. There are also all these “bored” people who are always just sitting there watching what this one is saying to the other. Perhaps the boyfriend does reply to her tweets but does so via DM (Direct Message) where the message will only be seen by her: the person it’s intended for.
Even though I didn’t agree with the lady’s sentiments, it raised an interesting question:
“Should you and your partner be Facebook Friends? Does he/she have to follow you on Twitter and vice versa? Why?”
I personally don’t have a problem with either being friends or not. I think it depends on the kinda people that you are, how you met (perhaps you met on these platforms) and your preferred ways of communication. I however don’t think it should be an expectation or a requirement that “Now because we are dating you must follow me on Twitter and we must be Facebook Friends”.
Why? Don’t we meet at home? Don’t we chat on BBM/SMS already?
As far as I can tell, it’s mostly women who take such things to heart and I understand why because I’m a woman and I experience the same things.
When we are in love or in that infatuation zone we thrive so much on the public attention, it makes us feel like “Yeah, he’s acknowledging me to the world.” As if this means he would not cheat on you or it would make other women respect you as his woman & stay away, when we all know it doesn’t & won’t. The more you get him saying all those sweet nothings to you on Twitter, is the more someone else is saying “I want him to do that with me” and they’ll go for him (LOL, okay, maybe it’s not as simplistic) and also, people don’t like seeing happy faces man. That’s just the honest truth so when some see an exchange of these sweet messages, they go “ I wonder ba tlo fella kae” and wish for something bad to happen. You know that thing about how people rejoice in others’ misery? It’s real because Lord knows there have been moments (and I say this with the biggest regret) where I have rejoiced in other people’s misery.
So, in a case where either one of or both partners are celebrities, I wouldn’t encourage any of them sharing all those “Miss you baby” typa tweets. And taking offense when the man who goes shopping with you, sleeps next to you & gives you multiple orgasms every night doesn’t reply to your tweet or Facebook wall posting, is the biggest load of nonsense ever.
Kanti is it about how things are between the two of you or about everyone’s perception out there? Because the only reason you would be offended with him/her not replying on a “public” platform is IF it’s about the image you think it would portray to other people.
And shem I’m in no way saying that if you are dating a person you can’t laugh at their funny tweets, nor comment on their status updates, I’m talking about … eish, you know what I mean and these are not laws, they are my thoughts and opinions so people are allowed to disagree.
This is definitely so much easier for me to write than it would be to do in my personal space but sadly we live in a sad world… a sick world where you have to hide/conceal your happiness because if the rest of the world finds out you are happy and the reason why, they would try and steal it away from you.
So, should you and your partner be Facebook Friends? Does he/she have to follow you on Twitter and vice versa? Why?
P.S. Dear #FutureHusband, I know what I wrote but I’m asking nicely shem, please reply to my tweets/FB messages coz mina I’m sensitive. *hides